Want resilience? Find resonance first.
Photo by Artem Maltsev on Unsplash
One of the signature tools I share with my individual coaching clients involves creating a reactivity blueprint.
This is probably one of the most valuable processes each of my clients goes through, and results in massive and immediate growth spurts in all areas of life. It inherently reactivates their personal power, and simultaneously brings their nervous system back into resonance.
Then, the true coaching can actually begin. But not before. Which is also often the most frustrating experience most people have in their coaching with me.
They want to hop in and become a rockstar over night, but they want to skip all the juicy work that will not just get them to rockstardom, but actually keep them there.
This particular tool is fundamental, as it also teaches them how to be available for feedback and unthreatened by truth. It is The Thing that allows growth to perpetuate itself (aka: it helps them become truly sovereign and resilient).
Further to that, my experience is that most people who come to me actually can't see much further beyond the part where they get access to equanimity. The dissonance created in their nervous system by unconscious reactivity is garbling their capacity to hold a solid vision for themselves of who they are actually capable of being.
In the best case scenario, they have had a teeny tiny taste of their vision, power, and impact, but have no means to actually be driven by it full time. Their entire lives, including their internal landscape, has been built to keep them stuck at the starting gate.
Quite literally, they are in full time fight/flight/freeze mode and have normalized it to such a high degree that they aren't even aware it's happening. The result is that they have become wildly myopic and are consciously looking for easy fixes that make their problems go away.
Fun scientific fact: energy doesn't disappear, it can only change form. You can't get rid of the bad energy circulating your body; you have to transmute it. And if all systems are currently consuming energy to process perceived danger and threat, no energy is available for growth.
Seems kind of obvious to me, but if you had a tool that could reallocate that energy to somewhere more productive, wouldn't you want to get mastery in using it?